08 Oct Greatest Hits!
As I write this, I am about a month away from retirement as a therapist at Family Practice Associates of Lexington. I suspect that I will write one more blog after this which will be a farewell blog. But for this penultimate one, I want to think through my many years of writing these and do a kind of bullet list of what I consider some of the thoughts and themes that I believed in most or which I think are most common in my work with patients. So, in no particular order other than the order in which they came to mind, here are what I’ll jokingly refer to as my greatest hits!
- After you have done the hard work of determining what is true for you, get busy implementing it. Act on the Truth!
- Remember that you are “hardwired to make mistakes but worthy of love and belonging anyway” (per Brene Brown).
- Also from Ms. Brown, guilt is I made a mistake and shame is I am a mistake. Guilt is both functional and healthy. Shame is neither.
- Don’t let the “how” become the “what”. That is, how you say something is often at least as important as what you are trying to say.
- The people with the best boundaries and the people with the most compassion are the same people. Having healthy boundaries does not mean you don’t care.
- Hearing and understanding are more important in loving relationships than conveying and convincing.
- Let go of the way life was supposed to be and embrace how it is.
- Your power is in the present moment. Learn from the past, then let it go. Set your direction into the future but live it with a Now, Here, and This focus.
- God grant me serenity to accept things I cannot change, the courage to change the things that I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.
- Similarly, God grant me the serenity to accept the people I cannot change, the courage to change the one that I can, and the wisdom to know that it’s me.
- Remember, for those in our lives who are battling substance abuse and other addictive issues and behaviors, often what they are really longing for is a sense of deep connection. But that does not mean always saying “yes” to them.
- If you consume alcohol, make sure you are being intentional with your choices based on what is low risk for you. Know in advance of any situation in which you will be drinking how much over what period of time keeps you at a low risk level.
- The low-risk alcohol consumption level is not the same for everyone. Genetics, in particular, must be factored in.
- People who have a healthy relationship with alcohol will not be bothered AT ALL if you choose not to drink. If they are bothered by your choice, it’s likely they have their own issue with it.
- Depression is a deadly disease. It is not to be ignored in yourself or dismissed in others.
- Don’t do anything right…..accidentally! Live with intention.
- Be very intentional about self-care.
- Seeking help is not only not weakness but sometimes it is the very height of strength.
- The greatest thing you’ll ever learn is just to love and be loved in return.